CONTROVERSIAL: Let's talk about the Taliban

The first time I saw you was at the Khyber Pass. You came with your technology, with elite soldiers driven by vengeance, full of hubris, believing you could defy history.

This was a war you did not have the courage to fight. But I am glad you tried.

We made you bleed, just as we made the Soviets bleed in our Holy Land. We bled you the same way the Vietnamese bled you in their homeland. We did it patiently and intentionally.

Patience. Something Westerners never learn.

Our history is a thousand years old. We do not seek early victories when the infidels ravage our Holy Land. Our victory will be celebrated in decades. We have endured and then devastated every standing military that crossed our borders. Why? How? We are patient.

In 30 days, we will be stronger and richer, with control over valuable natural resources that you need for your pitiful, convenience-driven life. We will have women, wealth, land, weapons, and property in one of the greatest chapters of military history.

You have lost.

If you want to try again, we look forward to the challenge. You will fail, no matter how much money you burn in our deserts. Out of pity, we give you a free piece of advice that could contribute to future success if you ever decide to invade again.

You recruit your warriors and supporters from a drug-obsessed, confused, disillusioned population obsessed with comfort and entertainment. A population that loves to alter their everyday reality. Alcohol, marijuana, pills, and our new favorite – Tide Pods. Every time your doctors prescribe opioid painkillers, you fill our coffers with gold. The thirst of your citizens for our unadulterated heroin has never been so profitable for our warrior tribes. We will feed you poison until you stop.

If your population were not spineless, undisciplined, and self-loathing, maybe you could assemble a raider group that would surpass ours in tenacity.

Our fighters are born for war. They are raised in it. It is a way of life that eludes your "First World" nations. They live a life that brings so much misery and pain, willing to fight barefoot in the snow, to have the chance to die as martyrs. They long for the opportunity to die. When they have the blessed chance to sacrifice themselves, they sit with Mohammed to the right of God. Blessed be Allah forever.

What honor do your fighters receive? Your empty sacrifice is honored with a "three-day weekend." The majority of your population uses this sacred time to get drunk and grow fatter, celebrating your fallen soldiers. Sadly, we honor their deaths in a more honorable way.

The colorful scraps you pin to their chests resemble the jewelry our women wear. What good is fame and vanity if you do not have the courage to endure a fight? We do not burden our fighters with healthcare, as they often want to die for Allah. Your fighters fight to live. Their inability to accept the inevitable result of our patience leads them to commit suicide. Their medications, advisers, and non-profit organizations will never undo the pain and suffering you have inflicted upon them. They will never erase the pain we have caused to your broken nation. You are your own worst enemy.

We will acknowledge your fighters. Some are creative, resilient, and fighter. They are superior to us in every way. But as I said, we simply wait. Allah is patient. You send them through our Holy Lands for their combat missions every 3 to 12 months. After their mission, they return to their warm beds and endless entertainment. If you had left them here, in our Holy Land, with no option but victory, then you might have had a chance of success. The longer you poisoned our Holy Land with your presence, the more your "rules of engagement" strengthened our position. In war, there is only one rule, and that is to win.

Your commanders made you fight with hands tied behind your back. Your rules also confused our fighters. "We are clearly the enemy, why do they let us go?" We thank you for the compassion that allowed our fighters to kill more infidels. We felt like your commanders were on our side. We are grateful that your most vicious dogs were never unleashed.

Your showcased generals make us laugh. They spend millions of dollars to fly through our country and invent new ways to win, while ignoring the instructions of our most capable enemies. Your generals make decisions to minimize any risk to their fragile reputation, with the ultimate goal of securing a lucrative retirement – jobs with suppliers that support your inferior army. A circle of selfishness built on the backs of your youngest and most naive fighters.

Your retired generals "earn" tens of thousands of dollars by speaking to your political, industrial, and financial leaders about "teams, victories, and discipline." It is a mockery of the war they refused to fight. It is a mockery of the unbelieving warriors who died in our lands. We urge you to continue following these empty figures so we can continue to watch your once great nation crumble.

Your statesmen and elected representatives are spineless, narcissistic, and even more cowardly than your generals. They crave power over all else. They come to our land, hide behind blast walls, and only listen to the word of that native leader they brought to power. I believe their soldiers call it a "self-licking ice cream cone."

You have burned billions of dollars in the futile attempt to bring clean water, electricity, economy, education, agriculture, and exports to a region that did not ask for it. You could have saved yourself the trouble and simply given the money directly to us. Don't worry, your diplomatic friends have given us a lot of your American taxpayers' money. If you want to try again with your "Soft Power," send people with real experience, not fancy degrees and silver tongues.

In the coming months, we will make it clear to the world that you have failed worse than any fighting force that has ever invaded our land. Today, we celebrate victory.

As you evacuate your embassy, our fighters will be in the shadows. We thank you for the farewell gifts. They will find surface-to-air missiles in the backseats of the Toyota pickups you bought for us. Our snipers will be patient.

We have seen what Extortion 17 has done to your nation and the morale of your armed forces. Do your citizens even remember this victory? We will repeat and expand our triumph, while your citizens and sympathizers flee in shame. Every one of your enemies around the world will know exactly how to break you.

Feel free to fly your empty drones, target our phones, and send out your spies. But they too will ultimately fail. We will use their failures to show the world that you are not all-powerful. You are a false facade. An empty shell. You lie, cheat, steal, and are easy to defeat because you lack the backbone to fight. This is now your story. We are grateful that Allah has given us the opportunity to show the world how to defeat the infidels.

We look forward to seeing you on the battlefield again.

Praised be God,

The Taliban

Notes on this article

No, of course, this is not a letter from a real Taliban member, but a fictional speech. Matthew Griffin of COMBAT FLIP FLOPS has expressed his shared anger and sorrow over the events by writing this: "If you have read this far, thank you. I have spent the past week trying to find a way to express my thoughts to the American people in a way that would evoke anger, action, and understanding. Writing in the voice of a Taliban member felt right." Both are experienced soldiers, both have actively fought in Afghanistan, but also love this country, and both, with COMBAT FLIP FLOPS, have a company that also tries to help economically in the region of Afghanistan, create jobs, work with Afghans. The defeat in Afghanistan hits them doubly.

This text is naturally being discussed controversially in the USA because it fictionally speaks the language of the enemy. It was even blocked on Instagram and all COMBAT FLIP FLOPS accounts were shadow-banned. The authors are aware of their provocative approach. Matthew Griffin writes: "If the article has made you angry, brought you to tears, or made you thoughtful - then we have achieved our goal. We hope it encourages you to take action with your elected representatives. Since World War II, you have been repeating the same unsuccessful game with your sons, daughters, and tax dollars. If you want it to continue, do nothing. If you don't, then do something. If we all do a little, we can achieve a lot together."

Reprinted with permission. Special THX to Griff

About the Authors

MATTHEW GRIFFIN graduated from the United States Military Academy in 2001, Army Ranger, combat veteran of the 75th Ranger Regiment (3x Afghanistan, 1x Iraq), CEO of Combat Flip Flops, author, and 2019 Henry Crown Fellow of the Aspen Global Leadership Institute.

SCOTT CHAPMANN graduated from Murray State University in 2000, Army Ranger Fire Team Leader of Alpha Company 2/75th Rangers ('01 - '05), OGA Blackwater Alumni, entrepreneur, and author. War veteran (21x Afghanistan, 1x Iraq)

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